Why go outside and meet people when you can just swipe left or right on a screen from the comfort of your bed?
It’s all just so easy, especially when you’re desperate for a warm body come Valentine’s day.
I pulled these questions from a checklist in my book, where I include three entire chapters to hands-on checklists and inventories about your love life. What are the three most important characteristics to look for in a partner?
Men and women have the hardest time with this issue, as they’re usually too focused on sex appeal and personality ‘sparks,’ and focusing too little on the factors that actually matter the most.
If you’re lucky enough to be spend much of your life with someone who has those qualities, you are going to have years of happiness and peace ahead of you.
A man and woman face each other across a table at a downtown bistro, looking nervous and awkward. There is a stiff formality to the way they sit—no slouching. In reality, premature or exaggerated revelations are due more to boundary issues, unresolved pain, or self-centeredness than true intimacy. Maybe your first date questions will lead you to discover that this person is your soul mate—or maybe not.
All the observable and obvious clues: They are nicely groomed and wearing freshly pressed clothes—stylish, but not overdone. Should the relationship evolve, there will be plenty of time to get into weighty topics. When a person reveals too much too soon, it can give a false sense of intimacy.
If you are friends with the person then thoughts of what this could do to your friendship run through your mind.
If you are meeting this person for the first time, there are a thousand thoughts running through your mind of what are they like, will they like me, will I like them.
The two pick at their dinner salads, staring down at the leafy mound before them. Finally, one of them tries to grease the wheels of conversation. The process begins by providing lots of space for the full expression of information and asking follow-up questions to further draw out the one talking.